my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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