I love having hate sex.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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