your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
It's just like the Real World with babies
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
