We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize