Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
