Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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