she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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