she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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