That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
