My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize