If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize