it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
