And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
There are leaves in my underwear?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
