Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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