That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize
