He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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