Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
i think i have herpe
just one?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
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