Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
