I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
