Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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