CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
