Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
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