Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
