is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Randomize
