white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Drake has all the answers
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
