Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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