I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
