I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
