How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
