So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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