saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize