we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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