the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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