but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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