so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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