what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
