I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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