Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
