it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
