Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Randomize