At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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