garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
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Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
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When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize