Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
