There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
