Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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