Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
