i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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