Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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