What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
