I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize