ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
